Eurobeat – the Pride of Europe is a faux Eurovision Song Contest set in the microstate of Liechtenstein in the heart of the Western European Alps. It is hosted by the glamorous Marlene Cabana who is a cultural icon, or at least imagines she is, in her homeland.
The competition has ended up in Liechtenstein by accident by it doesn’t stop them embracing the competition with great enthusiasm. All the things we love about the real Eurovision have been highlighted and amped up as we poke fun at cultural stereotypes and elements of Eurovision that have become legendary – key changes, over the top and sometimes mystifying songs and costumes reveals. Marlene steers the audience through the ten entries of the competition and at the end of act one the audience is instructed to vote on their favourite. These votes are tabulated during interval and genuinely reflect the audiences wishes so the outcomes is unknown until the votes are counted.
Returning in Act two we are greeted firstly by an upbeat ensemble number to welcome everyone back to the proceedings and then treated to a special performance by Marlene. After that Bjorn Bjornson, the master of protocols, joins her and together they count down the votes until the winner is revealed. The winners then return to the stage to perform for the audience their winning number. A glittering finale brings the entire company back on stage for bows.
Marlene Cabana
The hostess of the show is intended as a drag queen but could be played as an over the top glamourous aging celebrity. Age - mid forties.
Gender: female
Bjorn Bjornson
Master of protocols for the competition. He is boring, full of unnecessary details and self importance. He is Swedish with a ‘hurdy gurdy’ accent and is unaware that no-one is as interested in statistics as he is
Gender: male
Astrid Lungstromberg
Entrant for Sweden. Based on the Swedish Eurovision winner 2012 and 2023. Astrid is an eccentric, somewhat crazed woman in her late twenties to late thirties.
Obwody Wirujące
Entry for Poland are a three piece male electronica group whose vocals are limited. The act is counterpointed by three Polish milk maids dancing and singing along with a polka. The maids are young the males can be any age or even masked.
Gender: male
Earnestasia
Entrant for Romania. Dark and serious, Anastasia is a woman of indeterminate age who sings her nonsensical lyrics as if they were profound and loaded with meaning.
Gender: female
Nigel and Nadine
Entry for the United Kingdom. Harking back to music hall style performances, this English couple could have featured in a Carry On movie in the 1960s. They are a middle aged couple.
Gender: any
Idomus
Entry for Lithuania. The young man and woman performing for Lithuania are totally deadpan in their performance which is at odds with the upbeat nature of their song. With opportunities for unintentionally (on their part) hilarious choreography, Idomus are probably early to mid 20s.
Gender: any
Fanny Feuberger
Cultural Ambassador for Liechtenstein. She is mid to late twenties, bright eyed and very enthusiastic in every aspect of her presentation on the wonders of her homeland.
Gender: female
Kevin Kupferblum
Cultural Ambassador for Liechtenstein. He is mid to late forties and, in stark contrast to Fanny, is serious, almost dismissive, in his presentation on his homeland and on the script he apparently endures rather than enjoys.
Gender: male
Persephone
Entry for Greece. Persephone is a woman of two sides. In the beginning she is based on the Greek icon Nana Mouskouri, telling an apparently traditional story from her homeland. In the middle of the number, like the girl she is singing about, she undergoes a drastic transformation as she sheds her modest outer attire to become a raging nymph, ably assisted by her backing nymphets. Persephone can be any age from early 20s to late 30s.
Gender: female
Mateus Villela
Entry for Portugal. Mateus is a wistful, dreamy young man based in part on the singer of the winning entry for Portugal in Eurovision in 2017. He is a young man in his early to mid twenties.
Gender: male
Mother Morag and the Sisters of Perpetual Harmony
Entry for Vatican City. This mother superior and her trusty backing nuns are like a religious version of Diana Ross and the Supremes. They can be any age but typically Mother Morag would be early thirties to mid forties and the sisters somewhat younger. The big gag in this number is the reveal where they shed their nun’s habits only to be wearing the same thing underneath.
Gender: female
Estelle LaCroix
Entry for France. Estelle is very much the French chanteuse – serious, sad, almost contemptuous of everyone. She is in her thirties
Gender: female
Hammer of Thor
Entry for Norway. The trio making up Hammer of Thor are a disparate group. One member is a pop crooner, the next is a heavy metal rocker and the third is an operatic soprano straight from Wagner’s Ring Cycle. They can be any age.
Gender: any
"It’s '12 points' for ‘Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe’" - London Theatre
"Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe, a highly enjoyable pastiche of everyone’s favourite music competition" - Musical Theatre Revue – London
"Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe is a night to indulge in feel good fun." - Culture Bean. (London)
"As well as genuinely brilliant and hilarious songs, the dialogue holding the show together is just as hilarious" - All That Dazzles. (London)
"It’s '12 points' for ‘Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe’" - London Theatre
"Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe, a highly enjoyable pastiche of everyone’s favourite music competition" - Musical Theatre Revue – London
"Eurobeat: The Pride of Europe is a night to indulge in feel good fun." - Culture Bean. (London)
"As well as genuinely brilliant and hilarious songs, the dialogue holding the show together is just as hilarious" - All That Dazzles. (London)
Billing
Requirements
Long Form Billing:
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TEXT |
Size |
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Eurobeat- the Pride of Europe |
100% |
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Book, Music and Lyrics by |
30% |
|
Craig Christie |
50% |
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music arranged by Craig Bryant |
25% |
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By arrangement with Music Theatre International www.mtishows.com.au |
25% |
Short Form Billing:
|
TEXT |
Size |
|
Eurobeat- the Pride of Europe |
100% |
|
Book, Music and Lyrics by |
30% |
|
Craig Christie |
50% |
|
|
|
|
By arrangement with Music Theatre International www.mtishows.com.au |
25% |